A Christmas Story

There is very little that seems more idyllic than sharing family time in front of your grandparents' Christmas tree after having opened gifts on Christmas Eve. Everyone is full from dinner, but contemplating the trays of cookies on the coffee table, and conversation is generally focused on the stupid things that the dog does when it snows. At this time, one might start to think how nice it is to be around family at the holidays. That is, until your grandmother turns to you and announces out of the clear blue:

"Chicagoan, your biological clock is ticking."

"Tick-tock. Tick-tock."

Family, indeed.